As I sit exhausted, overheated, praying and puzzling a few things come to mind . . some are things I must work towards or resolve . . some make me question . . I am so blessed to have this son ..
and am grateful when we are able to spend quality time together . . this week has been an odd (as in this doesn’t happen often) mess of teen male hormones with an aspergers twist . . I am exhausted (did I say that already??) to tears even after a nice morning swim and a decent afternoon nap . . this week he seems bent on breaking my heart . . yet, as evening begins to settle in, I can see a gentler sweet Matt reemerging. . . maybe this week will be better . . . . . one thing that came from the sass was a realization that he would like to have his own apartment one day . . so I may begin teaching him money management soon! He does, however, have to finish high school before he moves . . he’ll be home a few more years. .. . and the boy who was never leaving home is growing into the man who wants his independence. . . this will mean watching him make his own mistakes . . watching him get hurt . . this will be really really rough for me as I’ve spent so many years protecting him (or at least trying to) . . I’m thinking parenting an iver-trusting adult with aspergers could be way more painful than all he went through as a child!!
So, as I look for our new home . . remember I told you I plan to move when my lease is up in October?? . so the new place needs to be where I can be happy alone . . but also a safe place for Matt to come home and find refuge when the world periodically chews him up and spits him back out . . as the world so often loves to do. . ๐
Parenting is one of lifeโs jobs that never ends, especially for those of us who have a child that has needed us so much in the past. Iโm glad to hear that you will be teaching Matt to be an independent adult. Believe me, it will be one of the hardest things you will ever do. Weโre still in the midst of this challenge, but with Godโs help, you, and we, will succeed.
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It is a struggle as he’s 17 yrs physically, 21+ intellectually but sometimes about 8-15 emotionally . . we’re taking it one day/step at a time
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I’m not a parent but seeing what the role of a mother entitles through my mom, has thought me that its not easy at all. I pray that God’s guidance, strength and peace be added unto you and your lovely son in Jesus Name! Much love! Xx
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Thank you so much ๐จ
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Youโre so welcome!
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As a Child Development Specialist, I know all to well the ups and downs of all children, especially those with individual needs. I pray your move is smooth and successful for you and your son. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.โค๏ธ
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Thank you so much!! ๐
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