I’ve been thinking a lot lately . Well, really not a lot as much as a nagging feeling that I should be thinking about it.. still, there it is.. will I grow old alone?
Now, yes, I do know that Matt will be around. He’s a dear son and I can’t imagine him deserting me in my old age..
But, a son is sweet.. and he does dote on me which I just eat up..
But, a son is not a husband.. Matt and I are close and I love him dearly.. but, with the autism he’s in his own world quite a bit and I’m left to my own thoughts and devices..
Really, I’d love to have a man in my life who is, above all, my best friend.. someone I can chat with about anything and everything.. someone who can’t imagine life without me.. someone to hang out with.. argue with.. make up with.. fall truly deeply in love with..
Yes, I can successfully grow very old very alone..
I can babysit for Matt’s kids once he’s married.. I can have a garden.. sail the world until I can’t walk unaided.. quilt.. sew. .. bake..
Time to pray more .. 🙏